A Series on Immortality – Part 2

Whereas the patent discussed in my last post is still mired in the Patent Office, today’s patent has actually granted. This one is titled, Human-Like Emulation Enterprise System and Method, and it has been cited by such watchdog groups as the Organization of Mind Control Victims:

USP 11,287,847, FIG. 7

This patent follows the same basic thought process as the previous one, where information about the person is recorded and then later used to replicate the person in a new body. But this time, the applicant actually got a patent for their invention!

USP 11,287,847, FIG. 13

If I had to guess, it’s because their independent claim is about two miles long. For visual impact, here are the relevant pages of the patent, with claim 1 indicated in red:

USP 11,287,847, claim 1
dat claim doe…

Now, for those of you who aren’t specialists in patent claim interpretation, a good rule of thumb is that each additional word in a claim tends to make it narrower in scope. Patent examiners are known to use the “four-finger rule,” where if the claim is shorter on the page than the breadth of their hand, it is probably too broad to be allowable.

I am guessing that this patent examiner was following the one-leg rule, where a claim that is longer than their entire leg is so narrow that nobody will ever bug the examiner if they just allow it to get it off their docket. If the examiner had bothered to read the claim, I expect there would have been rejections aplenty on technobabble word salad like this:

wherein the self-reliant human-like entity receives data derived from PDA information to at least one design, construct, update, and operate upon that comprising an already constructed relational database in constructive memory derived from observation by the 360 degree audio and image subsystems and incorporates a computer architecture with at least one artificial neural network for conducting at least one supervised and unsupervised learning to derive at least one neural correlates of consciousness, a patterned language from imagery, or understanding from audio data to assist at least one subscribing biological, biomechatronic, and mechatronic system operating in each environment.

USP 11,287,847, claim 1

When I was in law school, we spent some time debating the utility requirement; 35 U.S.C. 101 requires that an invention be useful to receive a patent. But, if an invention isn’t useful, is there actually any harm in granting it? Similarly, if a purported invention is impossible, is there any harm in letting someone claim they own it? They wouldn’t ever be able to enforce it, after all, because nobody would ever want or be able to make it!

In this case, even though the patent is impossible to practice, even though the claims are so narrow as to be uninfringeable, there are people out there who take it seriously and use it to further the cause of madness. You might have missed that link in the first paragraph to the Organization of Mind Control Victims, so let me just hit that note again: There is an Organization of people who consider themselves Victims of Mind Control. They have a page on their website where they list patents relevant to mind control. I am going to use it as a reference for future blog posts. They write letters to their government and others demanding that they stop the mind control.

While all that material is a fun read for people like me, enabling others in their delusions is not generally considered prosocial behavior. The best argument I heard against allowing nonsense patents was to maintain the integrity of the U.S. patent system. I take that to be a generally positive, if poorly implemented, goal. But every lazy patent examiner who allows an immortality patent is stamping this awkward eagle on that nonsense, putting the authority of the U.S. government behind it.

Before I leave you for the day, I just wanted to touch on one other quote from the patent. I love that the inventors name-dropped basically every hyped-up modern technology in their application. The only thing missing is block chains:

For instance, recent improvements in enterprise architecture, brain activity sensing systems, artificial neural network mimicking systems, 3d printing, Nano technology, 5G computing, quantum safe computing, and fusion electrical power generation systems have not been incorporated into a human-like emulation enterprise.

USP 11,287,847, col. 2, lns 1-14

Basically, I admire their dedication to completeness:

A space station 307 that orbits earth may serve as a staging platform for spaceship 146. Additionally, spaceships may include 3d printers and materials that are operated upon to maintain and produce PDA and entities 567100113165 and the like. Additionally, is anticipated in the present invention that the entities and spacecraft 146 are powered by a fusion reactor 147 that generate electrical power.

USP 11,287,847, col. 19, lns 23-30
USP 11,287,847, FIGs. 26a, 26b, 26c

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